ix Culmination of school life

                

I studied for my S.S.C. exam with renewed vigour.  Even when the house was in a cluttered state, I didn’t bother to pay attention to the house.  I either stamped or kicked the things, which came in my way knowingly, as I read for the exam pacing the room and the balcony.  Hari went to school but he did not study.  He loafed about in his spare time and watching cinema was his main concern.  He started pilfering my text books and sold them.  S.S.C. text books fetched him reasonable price.  Under such difficult circumstances, dad and mom requested my maternal grandparents whether they would allow me to stay with them for a month in their place and study for S.S.C. exam.  My grandparents replied, ‘It is better for a child to be with its parents than with anyone else. It’s our sincere advice.’  There was no one to understand the situation of my father who wanted his daughter to study.

Somehow an arrangement was made.  My paternal grandfather agreed to it.  So I packed all my books and clothes in a big bag and proceeded to the station.  Dad made me sit in a Shimpli bound train.  I got down at Shimpli station.  Dad had directed me to take the lane to Solo talkies.  A south Indian lady in nine yards saree at once spotted me.  “You are Rangesh’s granddaughter.  Your face and features are like him.”  I was stunned.  I said “yes”.  She guided me to my destined place.  I was welcomed there.  Maya atthai was there with her children.  I saw grandfather resting on bed.    A small room in the upstairs was allotted to me. I revised what I studied. 

I could hear my paternal aunt and her husband talking something in the room which was on the right hand side.  I understood aunt Maya was pregnant again.  I wondered how this lady managed to have so many children.  The eldest son Naresh was on job.  He had to go to office.  Many chapattis had to be rolled.  Aunt knew I was unwilling.  She told me, ‘No need to study all the time.  Come down in the kitchen and roll out chapattis.’  Chapattis were thick and big.  They were baked without oil.  A white cloth was used to press the sides of chapattis.  The chapattis puffed up well.   Aunt taught me to ascertain whether the chapattis were cooked. She asked me to tear a bit at the sides.  If one sees two layers, then it is cooked.    After finishing the work, I went up to my room and continued to study.  Before I could get up in the morning grandfather would have the radio on.    I would listen to the lovely English tune as I would come down for brushing my teeth and having my tea. He listened to the International English News. Once I passed through the front room.  Grandfather commented, “What will girls like you do after getting educated?”   Grandfather felt that educating a girl was worthless. He did not see any of the females in his family so much involved in studies. He believed that girls are born to get married and cannot be breadwinners. I could not compromise with such views. I didn’t reply but I had my goal clear.    Grandfather was strict about postures.  At night he saw to it that I didn’t sleep curving my body.  Aunt Maya dominated the family.  She looked after grandfather.  Grandfather kept on complaining about this and that.  A tiff took place between aunt Maya and grandfather.  She commented, ‘I have to look after this old man who cannot adjust with any of his daughters in law.’  Grandfather told, ’Keep quiet.  It is you who have axed my family.’  I didn’t understand these words.  The family seemed to have rifts.

One day Subbu uncle and his wife came.  Aunt Maya and people in the house were laughing and talking.  All of a sudden, the words of aunt Maya sparked off the quarrel. Aunt Mala told aunt Maya, “What is the use of increasing number of children one, two, three, four and so on.”  Aunt Maya became wild with anger. “You are jealous because you have only one kid. God has given me children.  They are God’s gifts.”  I knew aunt Maya was worldly wise.  She knew how to extract money or favours from others.  She was close to those brothers who helped her financially like Seshan and Picchu.  During functions she took a chance to demand sarees from her brothers.  She would say, “What is the use of having so many brothers if I don’t get gifts.” She considered it as a right to have gifts from her brothers.  I realized that daughters of the house can be arrogant and selfish once they have their husband and children.  They think more of the family they have created and not about the well being of parents and brothers.  Maybe it is in keeping with the Indian tradition.

Maya aunt felt that she should get me interested in watching Hindi films. She told me that the children portrayed in the film are as naughty as my brothers and sisters.  I watched the film in Solo talkies.  When I saw the film, I found the children portrayed in it, could neither match the mischievous nature nor the naughtiness of my brothers and sisters. But I found the film good and lyrical.  The film has a good plot bringing out innocence and naughtiness in children. I was impressed by the song because it was set to Hindustani classical music. The heroine’s father begins the melancholic song but is unable to carry on continuously because of intermittent cough. The heroine takes on and sings with her father. The heroine elicits the innocence of a teenage girl.  It was a very good family film. I liked to hum Marathi songs but reading Marathi newspaper was beyond my reach. My grandfather asked me to read a popular Marathi newspaper.  I said ‘No’.  

Aunt Maya, a shrewd, clever and a self styled diplomat managed the house.  She was all praise for her daughters.  She highlighted their good qualities.  She trained them in household work.   They stitched, made facials and were brightly dressed.  My aunt tried to inculcate in them all the qualities of true womanhood.  They performed the tasks allotted to them by their mother.  Grandfather liked Jyoti in particular.  He bought toy utensils for her to play.  I felt shy because I did not get the attention of my grandfather.  I felt, I was living in a stranger’s house.

I returned home after a fifteen day stay.  Dad came to receive me. On the day of exam, I remained cool.  My brother as usual sold my textbooks on the previous day of the exam.  They were books that fetched good money. He sold the books in Chitragaon book depot.  My parents scolded him and threatened him.  They got the information from him.  I got down at Chitragaon station, walked through a lane where there was a bookshop.  I paid money to get back my books.  I wrote the exam under pressure but confidence in me prevailed.  The exam centre was at Vanavli.  There was tight security around.  I had forgotten my spectacles.  My cousin Karnesh came rushing in.  He told one of the security man about the specs.  He requested him to hand over the specs to me.  It was a kindly and timely help. Karnesh did not express his feelings openly.  Aunts Hema and Ragini spoke about him in a distrustful manner.  They would ask me to be cautious about him.  “Beware of Karnesh.  He is a shrewd and cunning person.”   Sometimes they insulted him right on the face. He simply giggled and kept quiet.  For me, he was a plain good cousin.

 I wrote the paper well.  I also thought that I would soon be escaping from school life.  No restrictions anymore.  The farewell party was unique for me.  Autographs were given.  Plays were staged.   We were given snacks. Many of my class mates started crying all of a sudden.  I didn’t know why they were crying.  One of my classmates literally clung to me and cried “Sweet Rani, we will not be together again.”  My heart didn’t move.  I didn’t have the feeling that I was getting separated from my friends.  There was no feeling of bereavement in me.  For me, it was a chance to come out of the dark hole of privation, and being an unwanted girl child, I wanted to become independent.

After the exams ended, we three friends Shehnaz Zariwala, Suvarna Ovhal and myself had been to watch a Hindi movie.  It was a good light comedy. It deals with rumours which lead to confusion. The hero and heroine play double roles which become an additional cause for confusion. The songs contributed to the jovial nature of the film. It really relaxed and entertained my mind.  It had no violence, traumatizing scenes and politics which we see in today’s movies.

            Vacation began.  I had been to the outskirts of Shimpli.  Uncle Balan stayed in Belami.  His house was near Prem theatre.    Many houses were huddled together.  Shopkeepers were Sindhi speaking men.  I was told that they were refugees of divided India.  One would see women putting papads to dry.  Coir rope cots were used to dry papads.  Sindhis are lively people.  I saw that women wore colourful punjabi suits.  Some old ladies were in white sarees.  Young girls were trim, neat, fair and they had their hair nicely oiled and plaited.  It was nice to look at their luscious lipsticks and black kajal.  I saw one lady putting clothes to dry.  There were shops selling genuine ‘mawa’, milk condensed into dough.   Many Sindhis worked hard to make a living.  I reached Balan uncle’s house after I had watched the interesting colony of Sindhi people.

Uncle Balan was darker than my other uncles.  He was not tall but had a slightly upturned nose which was the most prominent feature of his face.  He worked for Swann International.  His marriage took place in South Indian Samaj, Sagarpur.  Marriage was performed according to family tradition.  The girl was from Sainagar, Sagarpur.  On the previous day of the marriage, the bridegroom is welcomed.  Next day during the time of muhoortham, tirumangalayam (Muhoortham is the auspicious time for tying the sacred marriage pendant) is tied around the bride’s neck by the bridegroom.  Three knots have to be tied which are important.  One of my uncles told me, ‘Your marriage will take place in the same way.’ I didn’t respond because I was confused about marriage.

I remember a movie about friendship which was shown during a function in Swann International at Ambatwadi. A blind man sings about friendship.  He remembers his undying love for his friend.  The film became popular and people in those times tried to imbibe values of friendship.  Balan was a dandy and a tiff with the gundas (goons) was not difficult for him to manage.  He had the initiative for good work.  He was honest and fighting the gundas was something he was used to.  His wife had to leave the job of a receptionist when she got a baby girl.  The baby girl, Anupama cried a lot and did not remain without her mother. The family members said that it was not good to continue with her job when the baby girl needed her attention. She had to leave the job and settle down as a housewife.  She was a fair woman with long hair, pleasing smile and a bit reserved.  She was not an outgoing personality but a self sacrificing, self effacing personality, deeply religious and ritualistic.  She celebrated festivals with great devotion and detail.  She could convert and convince her husband to her own way. She succeeded in transforming uncle Balan.  From a rough tongued vibrant and violent man he became a sober god fearing man.  But she never took the lead in speaking other languages.  The couple got a son called Satish, an extraordinarily active and brilliant child.   My brother Hari attended the birthday function of his cousin Satish.  But life is inconsistent and uncertain.  The child was struck by cancer. My uncle spent a lot of money at the Swann Company hospital to save his only boy child.  The child uttered a memorable sentence when he was nearing his death. ‘Papa, there is no light.  I think it is put off. Tata, I am going.’   The minds of the couple collapsed.  The sorrow created a great void in their lives.  After that uncle Balan was never the same.  He transformed into a whining, depressed and a prejudiced man.

Back home, I spent my time with my maternal cousins.  I went to Bhīma park, played cricket, saw the beauty of the wild forest. Monaco circus had pitched their tent in Pehrauli.  We decided to watch circus.  Karnesh my cousin, my brothers and sisters and I bought the tickets and we entered the circus tent.  Western music was quite appealing. We enjoyed the tricks of elephants, lions, jokers and live acrobatics of circus girls. My cousin said, “We get Cadbury bars free.”  We took a bar each.  We were surprised when the Cadbury man asked for money from another person who had taken the Cadbury bar. We didn’t have money to pay for the Cadbury bars.   We remained silent and sneaked out as quickly as possible and ran towards L.N. Road.  Fear gripped us and we ran the distance as fast as we could.

Mom had some husk of grains left in the house.  She wanted us to dispose it off.  My cousin Karnesh opted to do it.    He saw a goat on the other side of the road.  He wanted to cross over and go to the other side of the road.  The goat saw that he had some husk in the vessel.  It bleated and tried to cross the road to get the husk.   Before it could reach for the husk, a speeding truck killed it.  All of us felt very bad.  The incident registered a stain in our mind.  We remember the goat even today.

 My mother’s uncle came during the vacation.  His name was Murli.  We used to call him as Murli mama.  He wore a white lungi. Murli mama spoke to my mother and then turned his attention to my younger brother Mohan. He asked Mohan about his school. He didn’t reply but darted towards Murli mama to pull his lungi.  The uncle shouted and tried to retain his lungi.  However he was embarrassed and decided to leave our home early. Mohan continued to be naughty. We spent the vacation, visiting relatives and going for outings.

Vacation came to an end.  Results were declared.  My dad went to fetch the mark sheet.  School leaving certificate as given immediately.  When my dad reached home, he jumped up, shouted and laughed like a kid.  I scored first class distinction.  I was felicitated by the then corporator, who happened to be the chief guest.  I received some cash reward and college bag as a gift.  My parents didn’t bother to attend the function.  My mother was busy with household work and father with his job.  But I didn’t mind since it was the first spark in my life.

                                I’ve still to face many hitches and glitches,

                                Before I reach the region of actual success.

 The seed for the future is planted in the present.  The plant has to put up with vagaries of nature to grow into success.